Intergalactic RAP battle between floatingslowly and rob instigator
 

as discussed before, here it is as we throw down.



the man once known as cheeto55
instigates better than any man alive
make you a salad of lettuce and endive
so floatingslowly's turds take a toilet dive

cleaning out his colon via gastric bypass
geriatric tubing makes floating pass gas
can't control his anus, rhymes suck like john stamos
can't compete with me cuz I am the most famous

The Instigator devastator, anti-bush demonstrator
leaves tips for the waiter, not a cheap perpetrator
does not sport boots of ostrich or gator
leaves his lady all sore, he's a deep penetrator

so what you gonna bring to this battle floatingslowly?
I'm the rap Baloo to your hip-hop Mowgli
teaching you the ropes from the high to the lowly
leave your brain baked like a spinach stromboli

where you AT flowtingslowly! this took me just under 5 minutes come on!

he has no electricity, man.

crank that generator !

this one goes out to my North Side homies:


you gots to chill like EPMD said
rhymes won't flow with a frozen head

I've had

no power no shower and trees dropping like bombs
but when I bring it back full-strength you'll cry to yr moms

you'll say:

boo hoo hoo it's floatingslowly
he took me to rap school like I was a lowly

SCRUB

wallowing in yr own rhyme shit
you can't bring the joint when you've got no hit

just quit.

[here comes the bridge]

shit's real messed up now, I ain't a liar
even fuckin' cavemen had themselves a fire

[burnin' down di walls a babylon]

but when the ice thaws and I'm not living like cattle
I'll drop something better (we can have a real rap battle).

I should have waited a few weeks to call to the carpet.

that sucked.

I liked it!

loved the bridge

I called you Mowgli

cheeto55? sounds like old ass snack food
stay out the rap game, you'll get smacked dude

like some chick working tricks on the corner
did you hear someone clapping? it's yr only funeral mourner

he says "oh no! it's rob they're going to bury"
someone showed up the instigator and he lost his rap cherry

it was slowly floating down the stream
when yr rhyme hymen busted we all heard you scream:

"ouch! ouch! but don't stop though!"
I think you like being made my ho.

homedude cant even pay his electric bill
that's not next level

with shit slurry dippin'
poop chute slippin'
Jenkem bottle yr grippin'
sniff it up and start trippin'

headed for a rap sarcoma
Frozen up in Oklahoma
too much Okie Noodlin'
gives you bad catfish trauma

Yr tornado alley schemes
and wack rhyme routines
old and played like Brylcreem
are far less than they seem

With mad-vision like the Hubble
I deduce yr rhyme troubles
One hit wonder like the Buggles
soft as a bear selling Snuggle

On and On and On got the dope routines
Light up the glass bong, don't use no screens
beat you down for a song, got the ways and means
you best head to the john, 'fore yr shit hits yr jeans.

hahahaha

A-W-E-S-O-M-E

Rob-2
Floatingslowly-0

just stop.

[[in about 4 seconds, a teacher will begin to speak.]]

rob posted it on myspace.
I mean cryspace. :(
emo shit that's all "hey look at my face!"
put it out in a new years bulletin.
might as well try and put a
bullet in...my back.
cheeba cheeba cheeto
lay off the crack.
you sent it out like it was auld lang syne
cryptographic holograms and
gang signs.

[[[I opened it and read it. it said they were suckers]]]

now my name's dripping off the lips
of yr e-list gangstas.
crew of wanksters
faked funk pranksters.
drankin' purple juice
backward-masked dub.
subliminal floatingslowly
thanks for showing love.

(even though yr talking shit like
this was east vs. west.
my name's a fucking killing word.
you don't wanna come test.)

:D !!

It took you almost a month to come up with that?
And a DUNE reference, for god's sake?



So sad.

sometimes I hate my mac.

I can't type on this lil' ass keyboard.

I should blog about it.


yeah, it's been a rough month.

As I sits taking hits
tryin' to shake off the fits
and the football pundits
talk 'bout playoff shit
with the bytes and the bits
as floatingslowly admits
his rhyme mind be shaky like his rhyme themes be flakey
your hip hop permits
I'll be forced to remit
you smell rap's doodoo pit
I'll lick hip hop's sweet tit
fingernut her wet slit
go balls deep bit by bit
spread the word, ain't you heard? floatingslow gets the bird!

and on and on and on and on and on and on and on.......

get the bird?
who made you colonel?
better quit or I'll use yr brain as a urinal.
filling up yr head while I relieve my bladder
yr eye's are getting yellow, cheeto, what's the matter?
is it 'cuz my kung fu rap kicked yr rhymescheme in the nuts?
is it 'cuz yr too busy thinking about those bouncing butts?
dude, booty rap died in.... '97
stop trying to bring it back
this ain't pimp daddy heaven.
it's hell
and yr in it.
you might as well concede
yr never going to win it.

Isn't this a Doctor Octagon song?

it's on!

pee pee poo poo ca ca ca
endless flow of scatologica
secrete from the teat
or skeet from yr meat
greasy shits like manteca
Lube up for the Asswrecka
that's yr favorite dildo
(don't ask me how I know but let me tell ya that I know)
yr greasy slime shits make ya walk a little faster
(Maurice Jones-Drew's a ball-running Master)
can't get my head straight. got to hit the bong faster
floatingslow's rap is a hip-hop disaster

lol that one was good.

my shit's so dope
you prolly want to smoke it
but everytime yr on the mic
you step up and choke it.

[[don't do it]]

those are words from the grandmaster flash.
he'll steal yr woman while you "rhyme"
and run off with yr stash.


oh yeah, chief...I went there
now yr crying out yr eyes
and pulling out yr hair

[[don't do it]]

cuz it's the end of yr rap battle
my sweet prose beat the fuck
out of yr crap prattle.

oh snap

You talk Grandmaster Flash
He DJ'd at a bash
I danced so much, got a rash
even smoked a little hash
Just one quick caveat
(retrospective Basquiat)
at the Museum of Fine Arts
Flash scratched stops and starts

a great night to be sure
gorgeous women galore
floatingslow's kicked out the door
for being king hip hop bore
weak stale rhymes decrepit
had to fart but he kept it
filling up his colon
like an inner tube swollen
he calls these farts "Rhymin'"
but they're just rap designin'
he's a false hip hop god
perpetratin' a fraud
so see the people cheer
when instigator is near
they know never to fear
for my rhyme scheme's so clear

<--- has no problem being a false hip hop gawd.

<---partied with Grandmaster Flash

<---listening to ipod

<---named iPod iPooed.



<---hates Rob now.

at one point grandmaster flash started talking, "This next cut is by an artist, an artist that died too young, that left a mark on music that will last forever..." and people started yelling "Biggie!!!" and "2-Pac!!!"
and then Flash started spinning Smells Like Teen Spirit! ha ha ha!
those biggie 2-pac sycophants had to eat their shit!

EAT THEIR SHIT I said!

well at least now i've remembered what a septic tank is

yank wank seppo tank
rob's burned his rhymes
on rotten dank

(you stank)

texas is the reason
that our president's bad
and houston is the reason
why Rob's good rhymes are sad :(

because you suck
yeah, Rob you suck.
crusty punk dumpster diver
think Flash gave a fuck?

(hell no)

because the day's gone by
when you could do no wrong
and yr stuck in a rap battle
that's like viet nam

my robotic flow
is straight wreckin' shit.
you should just give up
you might as well quit.

(yr shit)

[mad scratching and mixing here]

"You must shoot more mo'fuckas b4 shootin Rob again"

die die earthman die

a38= 1-38e -q capslock

What you think about everytime
you type this shit and post yo' rhyme
y'all boardies say hell no
Rob floating ol'
and u be floating slow
Fuck so unreal son like a UFO
Your pic's so lame, ain't nothin to show
Got Ether on my stereo
Hit em' Up on after
Pop my gat out then you'll hear laugher

Why's Rob's pic a skeleton?
Saw him out bathin' in the sun
Somthin was callin to me...found out it's my gun,
Caught my eye, and he started to run
Aimed it, popped a shot, and got him done

I was the one who convinced Afrika Bambaata to rock over Kraftwerk and
Gary Numan samples. Just sayin'.

one rob is wack
and the other's even wacker
I can tag team the both of y'all
because you both sound like a cracker.

at least you came up with a track
that didn't smell like ass
unlike In'stink'gator booty rhymes
you have a bit of class.




I'm 159% terrified of you. :(