It's an interesting hobby to have, for sure.

I'm always looking for something physical to do. Truly believe humans are animals and aren't meant to be cooped up inside staring at screens all day: 17 degree Detroit weather or not

I agree with you. I'm (sort of) lucky in that I have a physical job and I'm not on a computer all day. Some people enjoy an office job and that's fine. However, I'd be suicidal after a week I reckon.

My entire past feels like a figment of my imagination sometimes, and I find physical reminders of it to feel foreign. Like "Oh yea, that's a thing which used to matter a lot to me." Sometimes it feels like my entire life was lived by someone else. Even dating that girl recently, I can't say that I remember much. I dreamt about her last night. She was giving me oral, and we snuggled, then I woke up alone in my bed. I hadn't thought of her in days prior, almost completely forgot. We've been broken up for a week (?) and dated for three months, shit doesn't even seem like it actually happened.

Was I always this spaced out or did I take one too many strolls down the information super highway?

Wonder how I'll meet a new woman. I don't like going out, tired of being some 'trendy art punk guy', and social media bores me.

Time to be creative? Keep my house clean, keep my hygiene and fitness up.

I'm tired of having to worry about my mom. I can barely be bothered to worry about myself, and that's what I need to focus on.

PCE OUT BITCHES

If life is a dream, then I want to wake up.

(EDIT: this isn't idealising suicide, don't worry about it [I realised as soon as I wrote this post that it deserved clarification]. I'm just saying I'd like to get myself out of feeling like I do now, to feeling something different and better.)

I feel as though I'm always tryna advise you, Choc. I enjoy pretending that I'm wise.

Live. Take risks. Strut your stuff, and give yourself a reason to smile. You shouldn't have to apologize for yr own existence. Nobody should, except for like Hitler, Ted Bundy, or tesla69.

Use your new source of income to fuel something creatively. Find a passion and stick with it. You're still young enough where you can practice something for a decade and only be in your mid-20s after you've honed your craft for that long.

Be confident in yourself by turning yourself into someone who you can confidently be.

Also learn how to torrent and watch Buffy, Angel, Arrow, and Daredevil in their entirety... and listen to more heavy metal. Let some of that teen rage out.

Sadness is only anger in disguise.

I was in the middle of trying to make a long and detailed response, before I realised that that would just sound like I was sulking.

Thank you Eugene

I'm scared now

Take care of yourself homie.

Just keep focusing on yourself and everything will fall into place. You’ll meet someone without even trying and you’ll get there man. You got a solid head on your shoulders.

Coming from the one person on this board who has actually met me in real life.

Thank you, that means a lot.

You are not wrong, who deem
That my days have been a dream;
Yet if hope has flown away
In a night, or in a day,
In a vision, or in none,
Is it therefore the less gone?
All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream.

-from Poe's "A Dream Within a Dream"

Decent poem.

As a friend, I recommend most of you posting here to not drink or use drugs. Take lots of walks and stronger physical exercise if possible - find a social hobby where drinking is not the focus like stamp collecting or bicycle touring - but it is all up to you and you have to just say fuck off to anyone who tries to keep you down, even - especially - yourself. The Buddha said (sic) desire is the source of all suffering and I take that to heart.

Thanks for the laugh Tesla.

That said, it is good advice. :)

I appreciate it.

I'm fairly social and sober 95% of the time. I've gone down the rabbithole one too many times in the past though.

My buddy and I actually hit the gym together now. Him to lose weight, me to gain muscle.

I just live alone and I often feel isolated. Getting a new job will help a ton.

Thanks tesla, for a smarmy conservative... that was nice of you.

I'd give ya positive rep if the system allowed me.

Had a weird/bad dream last night.

I was standing on the outskirts of town (near a new group of houses being built), waiting for a bus to arrive. When it did, it ended up being a platform with no walls or anything, but there were a good twenty or so people on there, a few of whom I knew (from primary school???). Once I got on the bus, almost all of them started smoking. One guy turned around and offered me one, and I said 'ew, no'. Then someone else kinda tapped me on the shoulder with one - it was warm, but it didn't burn. I didn't want to be a snitch, but that did it for me. I told the bus driver (to loud boos) and got off, fortunately right near my house (except it wasn't). I was trying to tell my parents about it, but then plenty of people from the bus came in, and soon there were dozens of people I vaguely knew just standing around and talking.

haaa haa haaaa

i have an interpretation. you wanna hear it?

here or as pm, your choice

Well, it is his choice, but the more entertaining option would be to share it here, obviously!!