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check out my sitcom pilot!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pd15HFoARTc
Seven Deadly Cinema is back, you sonic twats  (i still <3 u knox, yr not a twat :o ) |
Wacthed it. I dig the dood's jokes.
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I liked it a lot.
my favorite part starts at 10:06 |
Lol oh yeah! I forgot to ask. Those chicks smoke? Fuck!
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Yeah, I think his stand-up is pretty clever too. That's what inspired me to try and make a show based on him. Quote:
Thanks man, I appreciate it. I've watched this damn thing so many times that I can't even differentiate what looks good, and what looks bad/what's funny vs. what isn't. Quote:
I know, right? ;) |
I had no idea you were black. :EEK:
I wish I had more time to watch your sitcom. alas, I spent what little time there is watching your video of girls in panties dancing to heavy metal. WOW detroit is ugly like a motherfucker. life is too short. MOVE imo. |
6.5 pionts /10
i know.... that you know.... you can do better and go heavy'r down be more creative, ect i'm really now in the mood to go to a comedy show here they don't have that they still don't have time awareness why? why do europeans have no future time? they were brainwashed for 2000 years by churchbells now they only reach the awake state by the ringing of the bells if the church dies out they never reach a state of awakeness those euro apes or shall we make the word european a bit smaller eurape?? you-rapian they sure broke the record raping childeren congratulations to the vatican : YOU GROUP IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THE MOST RAPES OF CHILDEREN CONGRATULATIONS always know that i'm not a eurape even if they giving me a digital passport with ethnical subcoding on the digital passport you eurapes can shove their passport in their baboon retarded sapian ass digital passport??? like i'm going to get access into a ultra modern spâceship |
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I think he's referring to this atrocity: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VnZNrZwfSnA |
oh!! gonna watch now!
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alright, i watched the sitcom once, will watch again later and post comments. jootube was fuckin slow.
but re: the music video-- nice car shots-- and EXTRA POINTS FOR THE BLONDE IN THE UNDIES. she can make that butt wiggle! (i hope she gave a good audition in the casting couch-- hA!) okay mang. nice job on that pilot. will post comments later, maybe tomorrow or something. |
interesting!
Here's a theme for a future episode: Do You Know How I Can Travel Overseas Without a Passport? Or maybe I should keep that for my own sitcom? |
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Oh I know! Their server (or whatever) has been giving me hassle all week! I appreciate your patience with the load times and whatnot; especially seeing how long the video is. And please do, you're a man who's opinion I can really put some merit towards. Quote:
Yeah haha, her ass is the only thing about that video I actually like! :p I don't wanna whore my shit out too hard, but if you're actually interested in a GOOD music vid I've done, I couldn't recommend the UUUUUU vid more. Derek's music was intimidatingly good, and I really tried my best to rise to the challenge and create something worthwhile. You can watch it here if you'd like - www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9hp7D_RMGA Thanks again for all the compliments everyone, I haven't been on these boards in a LONG while. It's especially nice to see gmku return as a regular. |
alright mang here it goes. i'm taking notes as i rewatch so it will go in that order.
who reads the disclaimer at the beginning? handheld camera is cool but sometimes too shaky-- it pans wildly. more on this later. the main character i get is this horrible person. ("nobody is laughing") i like the cut to jesus. [later: i dont know what role religion plays for him] i don't hear well what they are saying in that room. are you using NR plugins to cut noise after recording? there's also loud hiss. not sure what mic you used but you can get a decent rode short shotgun for cheap ($100-200). the chick does a good job acting. his routine: use a de-esser the weird old man, arthur, is totally offensive and hilarious. his is one of my favorite segments. the canned laughter doesn't work for me most of the time. i like the music, generally. the thing friend back in the room it's funny too but the recorded laugh doesn't work for me. i won't say that again tho just try watching it without? are you using lights? there's a lot you could do with some cheap lowells. sitcoms and tv usually use high key light, it's easy to do & people can move around. so something that will boost the light levels should work. dr's office or something- handheld is cool but see about stabilizer. like a merlin, or a fig rig or something. you don't need to use a tripod, just have more camera control. 2 chicks on the bed w/ lights/effects was cool, is that what they want to do vs. what they are actually doing? regardless of whatever it means the contrast is cool. k having a hard time understanding the dialogue again. your boom operator needs more practice & some headphones. mannequin fucking-- bizarre and funny. when the door gets knocked, why the laughter? lisa does look good. oh mang the laughs why. stabilize camera. k one thing i realize at this point is the camera angles & shots. there's lots of long and medium shots and few closeups. also the camera angle from above doesn't work for me there. if you could cut and do the 2 shot at eye level it would work better. yeah you need to cut and set up again but it would work better. this reminds me w/ the old man the shots were also from above always. put that knee on the ground and get to eye level more. the shower part is more bizarre shit that i like with that wolf hat. oh i get that now that lisa cheated w/ the other girls? i don't get why these 2 like each other. the next routine i didn't like and i dont know if he's really joking or just playing an ass. anyway i think you got a good idea there, a character everyone can hate, and bring back that funny old man. for characters everyone can hate, it's not my kind of thing but there's shows like peepshow that are based on that-- ive had arguments w/ people here about it, but regardless, you don't need to have a "likeable" character. i just wanna see or hear more clearly what he's saying so mics is the thing to do. and lights. light that thing. also this is something completely different but have you watched "workaholics"? this reminds me of that show somehow-- well it's a stretch but it has some common stuff. watch it & see. anyway so if this justin guy is the main character, who are the others? is he a kind of mr. bean who exists in his own universe? or do the others around him count? i think they could come across more as characters of their own so you have more of an ensemble situation like seinfeld if that's what you like (i saw your post about the 90s), but they need more of a story rather than just be around him i think. but anyway if you had to prioritize 1 thing and 1 thing only i'd say start with audio! audio is more than 50% of video, doesn't need to be perfect but what they're saying has to be clear, like the old man, and make sure it doesn't clip. try having your dialogue peaks at -12 maybe? check this out and read up on part 3: http://www-tc.pbs.org/producing/medi...%20Revised.pdf you see their loudness target is -24db. that's PBS which is "quieter" than other TV but it works. or see this: http://forums.creativecow.net/thread/8/982763 ok man, i gotta run, i don't know if this was useful to you but i hope it was. ps- do you storyboard your shots? moar bout dat later. k-- be well dude. talk soon. |
Thank you so much, that was an excellent critique. Many things you pointed out were things I noticed myself.
Here's my attempt at responding to such a large post.... :) Quote:
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i can only answer quickly tonight but maybe tomorrow with more detail.
okay so what's the problem here is you need a crew! if you're doing this all on your own it's bananas. make the fucking actors crew for you when they are not in the scene. i highly recommend you storyboard and draw a floorplan. that way you can work out your blocking, your lights and your camera moves ahead of time. more on that later. i get that you want that office/curb your enthusiasm looks but even with those single camera sitcoms the framing is always done right, the camera angles work, and you get a good variety of shots-- e.g. when they talk into the camera, etc. look here for example: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kcf2CO65lf4 see how yheres a closeup as he approaches then the 2 shots are from the front & the side and it mixes them up? storyboarding can help you set that up and figure where you wanna place yourself before it happens. what you wanna avoid especially are the high angles on characters who are sitting. re: lighting you can work with regular bulbs and shop lamps that you clamp to things, as long as you have the same color temperature and while balance to them it should be okay. yeah, it's not as controllable as fresnels or light banks with egg crates but at least you get an improved look. the scene in the room w/ curtis, they are in the shade and the back wall is brighter.and your camera if it's got auto iris is adjusting for the wall and not the subject. and that's why i suggest using high key light, it's lower contrast and you don't need to set up every shot. here's an example: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JoQfztMBi6A one thing you could do is get some shop lights and bounce them off the ceiling or walls, it's as cheap as it gets (tho it can blow fuses, ha). anyway good to hear you've been thinkig about this things. don't fear the storyboard or feel confined by it-- it's like a rehearsal for your camera-- if you're going spontaneous, you're gonna do that, but at least in your mind you'll have an idea of what you want instead of getting stuck in a bad shot or "searching" with the camera and shooting all over the place. ps re- the floorplan-- it helps you see light ahead. for example when he opens the door and lisa is there, there could be a light behind the door so she looks better. know what i mean? but def keep working on this! you're on to something, i swear. oh and workaholics is on netflix online, if you have access watch it, it's fucking great, very funny, similar documentary style but not self conscious like office, but great fucking characters, you'll see. oh and there's an episode about juggalos! anyway we can chat about sound tomorrow, if you'd like. i hope i'm not being a fucking blowhard with the advice, i really believe in what you're doing that's why i'm taking the time to go over everything. okay. seeya! |
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you were probably blind drunk. i can't come up with a better explanation. |
Can't believe I missed this thread.
I agree with El Symbols re you needing a crew and in that sense, you really needn't worry about those technical issues too much. Just get people in who do know them. Film students will usually offer their help for little more than the promise of a credit. It's obviously a good idea to have some kind of grasp of certain techniques but only enough to have a way of conceptualising what you want for yourself and so you can communicate it to your crew. Echoing symbol's point, unless you want the style to be an integral part of the whole thing it should be as anonymous as possible, which isn't difficult to achieve and likely won't cost you any more than you're already spending. You just need to get the right people in and let them contribute what they're good at so you can concentrate on what you're good at, while learning off them at the same time. Look at a lot of the porn being produced at the moment. That stuff's largely done with tiny budgets and a minimal crew but still manages to churn out some really quite professional looking stuff. (I'm convinced film students these days would be far better served watching less Bergman and more BangBros.) |
^ Yeah, episode 2 will be the first time in my whole 'film making career' that I'm actually using a crew. I plan to have a sound guy (like I said) with a boom, and my other friend, Peter (who graduated film school with me...big Cronenberg buff) holding the camera. This way I can work wth the actors more, and have them figure out the shots (based on my storyboards...of course)
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Honestly, I couldn't agree more. Except for Hour of the Wolf. Everybody should see that. |
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Thanks man. I really appreciate the critique; it's hard to get such valid feedback IRL. |
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Persona |
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