Sonic Youth Gossip - View Single Post - Kim Gordon: Starbucks "Less Evil Than Universal"

clever name · 09.30.2007, 08:51 PM

This is totally neither the time nor the place to discuss this, but time and space don't exist on the internet so fuck all.

Has anybody who really, really enjoys coffee (I mean like wine afficianado-level of snobbery) noticed that even many dedicated local roasters simply can't match the quality of a cup of even the most inexpensive Starbucks coffee?

Starbucks coffee has mastered the process of roasting coffee to the point where others simply can't compete. You see, about 99% of all coffee beans that get brewed on planet earth are roasted only until what's referred to as the "first pop". This occurs roughly seven to nine minutes into the roasting process when the beans start to release the air trapped inside and make a corresponding sound.

Typically this delivers coffee that, even when brewed strong, is virtually flavorless unless you drink it black (even then it's not so great). Dunkin' Donuts coffee is only roasted until the first pop. There's also the matter of beans from different nations and how dark they each can stand to be roasted, but let's not overcomplicate shit.

Starbucks, by contrast, roasts their coffee for 11 to 15 minutes, which is a much more difficult thing to pull off without rendering beans that brew coffee that tastes burnt and bitter (you taste too much roast and not enough of the bean's inherent characteristics). Starbucks, with the truckloads of money that they have and continue to throw into research and development, have even patented their 2nd-pop wizardry. If you ever see the words Starbucks Roast printed somewhere, notice the little "TM" accompanying.

So just as with AT&T in the 1950's, which was the only major phone company because only they had the techno-expertise, the gear, and the infrastructure to allow phone calls that didn't sound like adult characters in a Peanuts cartoon, the de-Starbucksification of the gourmet coffee market (and while Starbucks still doesn't sell as much coffee as Dunkin Donuts, they're ever on the rise, having doubled their number of stores since 2003!) will require the intervention of the government, everybody's favorite big brother. Only by democratizing the sophisticated "Starbucks Roast" which is the cornerstone of their success can little shops begin to compete in any significant way.

In short, don't blame the Noise Idols, it's not their fault that Starbucks coffee is so fucking good. Write your congressperson that the breakup of the Starbucks monopoly is entirely dependent on the revocation of their roasting patent and the dissemanation of its secrets. I don't think that's what Kim meant to say, but I like what she said too.

09.30.2007, 08:51 PM	#14
clever name bad moon rising Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 111	This is totally neither the time nor the place to discuss this, but time and space don't exist on the internet so fuck all. Has anybody who really, really enjoys coffee (I mean like wine afficianado-level of snobbery) noticed that even many dedicated local roasters simply can't match the quality of a cup of even the most inexpensive Starbucks coffee? Starbucks coffee has mastered the process of roasting coffee to the point where others simply can't compete. You see, about 99% of all coffee beans that get brewed on planet earth are roasted only until what's referred to as the "first pop". This occurs roughly seven to nine minutes into the roasting process when the beans start to release the air trapped inside and make a corresponding sound. Typically this delivers coffee that, even when brewed strong, is virtually flavorless unless you drink it black (even then it's not so great). Dunkin' Donuts coffee is only roasted until the first pop. There's also the matter of beans from different nations and how dark they each can stand to be roasted, but let's not overcomplicate shit. Starbucks, by contrast, roasts their coffee for 11 to 15 minutes, which is a much more difficult thing to pull off without rendering beans that brew coffee that tastes burnt and bitter (you taste too much roast and not enough of the bean's inherent characteristics). Starbucks, with the truckloads of money that they have and continue to throw into research and development, have even patented their 2nd-pop wizardry. If you ever see the words Starbucks Roast printed somewhere, notice the little "TM" accompanying. So just as with AT&T in the 1950's, which was the only major phone company because only they had the techno-expertise, the gear, and the infrastructure to allow phone calls that didn't sound like adult characters in a Peanuts cartoon, the de-Starbucksification of the gourmet coffee market (and while Starbucks still doesn't sell as much coffee as Dunkin Donuts, they're ever on the rise, having doubled their number of stores since 2003!) will require the intervention of the government, everybody's favorite big brother. Only by democratizing the sophisticated "Starbucks Roast" which is the cornerstone of their success can little shops begin to compete in any significant way. In short, don't blame the Noise Idols, it's not their fault that Starbucks coffee is so fucking good. Write your congressperson that the breakup of the Starbucks monopoly is entirely dependent on the revocation of their roasting patent and the dissemanation of its secrets. I don't think that's what Kim meant to say, but I like what she said too.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|